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im feeling pretty useless. 

im not really good at anything. i feel like i used to be but maybe i was just fooling myself. my mind is a dark mess, scattered with the remnants of stale ambitions and forgotten passions.

my sense of self has been left bruised and malformed from past delusions of grandeur. the scalding knowledge i carry inside of me, that i am not special, that i am inadequate, that the world would be no different if i were to depart…utterly destroys me. 

i wish i was special, i wish i was loved, i wish i loved myself and i wish i was happy.